Ya, I'm sure we've all heard it before. "Life's too short, just go for it." Well, often its just a line I shake my head at (in a way that says, yip) most of my life.
Don't get me wrong, I understand all to well that life is WAY too short. When my kids were born, 18 years seemed like forever. Now they're out of the house and having children of their own. When I was in school, getting out seemed like forever away. I can barely remember those times since they were so short.
The cruel part is that it works the other way around. All those occasions when I thought I was "in the best shape of my life." Now that time seems like a flash in the pan. I've been out of shape, more than in shape throughout my short life. It's almost like I've bounced around, with my body walking around Earth, and my brain vacationing on Saturn.
This week I found out that my sisters husband lost a second employee/friend to a fluke traffic accident. He was working late at his mothers home, decided to head home (5 miles away) for a change of clothing, and fell asleep at the wheel. His car flipped, his neck broke, and now he's gone. That quick.
While looking hard at your own life might seem silly 95% of the time, I say it's time to get a little silly, a little more often... "What Todd, someone dies and now you're looking at what life's all about?" PLEASE, but even if it was this single event, why not?
Now I have friends who say the most important thing in life is family. I more or less agree, however I think my children would get a little tired of me after 72 hours straight. My wife means more to me than anyone on this small planet, but if we spent every hour together, I think she would be looking for another planet.
Shall I dare say it? Why not. You're the most important person, to you. Vain, not a chance. I spend ever second with "me", and while at times I don't get along with myself, we're still together... Simply, give yourself a break.
How many times do you have that inner struggle. The fights with myself are the toughest battles I've even encountered.
(Inner Dialog) "Should I treat myself to that? Is it right if I waste this money on something just for "myself." How can I "spin" this into a group purchase so I feel better about it? If I bought one for my wife, then it's not "just" for me. If I vacation there, and bring my bike (somehow) I could send my wife to the spa, and get in a ride."
Break down your day. I sleep 6-8 hours away, work 10-12 hours, then try to fit everything else into the remaining time. I read somewhere that we spend something like 2 years in the bathroom in our lifetime. The odds are that if I was to die tomorrow, I will be either sleeping, or working. It just doesn't make sense to beat myself up over decisions that would make my life more complete.
Without retreating to far back, life is WAY to short. Too short to be listening to "myself" give me a hard time about anything. True, I have responsibilities. I'm not saying that I'm going to go crazy, just that I've decided to give myself a break. If I want that new bike, I'm going to buy it. New gear, the same. If I need a break from work, I'm going to take it. Even if it's just a shorter day to enjoy the Fall weather.
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